Insanity.

For the past month (two more to go) my life has been quite amazing but also a mass ball of insanity!!! I barely have time to chill.
I am staffing the PURSUIT internship (a dts and ihop combined to bring together the missions movement and the prayer movement) and we are already a month into it...it is so awesome seeing God work in the student's lives and mine as well.
Its crazy the amount of pressure that we live under when we don't operate in the freedom God offers us. I have come to realize that I have adopted this pressure thats not mine to take up...that I have been so preoccupied, worried and fearful about finances and whats next in my life that I am not even enjoying whats happening right now in my life. Just anticipating the future and ignoring the present. I know that I have the tendancy to do that and then end up regretting my preoccupation with what is to come. I need to RELAX. God is so good that I know that I can relax, give Him everything that I have taken upon my shoulders and that He'll take care of it.
Now...I am also employed at two jobs that I work on the weekends, Montana's and Starbuck's....I dont know how I am going to juggle the PURSUIT, Montana's and Starbuck's. By the grace of God I guess. I just dont want to become so tired I transform into a zombie.
Two months left of this...but I know that itll be a time of great growth and challenges. My dad always said challenges bring character....sometimes i love that statement...lots of times its just annoying. haha.
God brings freedom and takes every pressure that is crammed into my cranium....He's pretty awesome.

Pressure.

The pressures of this world confronted me,
The worries of tomorrow surrounded me,
The stress of lack attacked me.

Thoughts enveloped my life:
Will I amount to expectations?
Do I know where I am going?
Will I have enough?

The more I worried the more frustrations mounted upon my shoulders,
The fears overtook my heart,
The complacency overwhelmed me.

Little did I know,
Lies attacked my heart,
Fear distracted my thoughts,
and worry captivated my mind.

Are the worries and fears and lies destroying the only sense of hope I have?
Is the fear of tomorrow blinding me from the promise in this moment?
Are the plans for the future distracting me from today?

What if I took every step in true confidence that God is leading me in those steps?
What if I went when He called me, and never relented to the temporary comforts of this world?
What if??????

Will I? Will we?






Live in the now. Relax. Live the life you have right now.
Dont live for tomorrow, for next year, or for later.
Live now. Before now is dead.

My Psalm

God,

You walk before me,
You walk behind me.
You make clear the paths set before me,
Which are the paths You lead me on.
I will not question Your ways,
Because Your ways are better than mine.
You have my heart on Your mind,
You will not disown, ignore, or cast aside my heart.
My heart is precious to You.
It is a gem held in the hands of love,
It is held with the upmost care by You.
I am precious.
The road that I follow,
I am not alone.
You are my protector,
You are always with me.
I will not be forgotten,
For Your eyes watch over those You love.
You are faithful,
You do not go back on Your promises.
You are the provider,
For You care for Your children.
Nothing I do can make you take back Your love,
Or say that I am not enough.
Through Your grace,
I am enough.
Your love is enough, Your grace is enough, Your power is enough.
There is no boundary to Your love,
There is no obstacle to stop Your grace,
There is no power that will take You down.
I am Yours.
You are mine.
Thank You, Jesus.

Plan A

Its Been Such A While Since I Have Last Posted Something And Not Too Much Of The Exciting Manner Has Happened That Requires Me Writing It Down Except For The Fact That I Have Applied And Been Accepted Into The Bethel School Of Supernatural Ministry Which Starts In September!!! This Decision To Go Down To Redding, California Was Actually A Quick Decision To Step Out In Faith. Fill Out An Application And Wait And See. I Had An Interview With One Of The Interns That Is Down At Bethel And It Went So Good...Just Asking Questions About My Life, Family, And Heart To Serve Jesus. After The Interview Was Over He Said That It Would Probably Take 3-4 Weeks On Letting Me Know If I Got Accepted Into The Bethel School Or Not.

Now...I'm Not The Type Of Person Where I Enjoy Waiting A Long Period Of Time To Know If I Am Accepted Into A Program Or Not. I Decided To Let God Know That. So I Prayed And Told God That I Don't Want To Have To Endure 3-4 Weeks Of Wondering If I Have Been Accepted Or Not, So If He Could Speed Up The Process That Would Be Sweet. Within Less Than A Week I Got My Acceptance Email And Screamed With An Intense Excitement That I, Jana-Marie Am Going To Bethel!!! This Is Such A Huge Step For Me And Out Of My Typical Ywam And Impact World Tours Bubble And Will Have To Somehow Finance My Food And Housing While Down There, Being Completely Unable To Work Or Have Some Monthly Income. And I Am Finally Figuring Out What Life Is Going To Look Like For The Rest Of 2010.

As Of Now I Will Be Intensely Busy With The Pursuit Internship ( A Dts+ Ihop Internship) Which Has Just Started Today In The Global Prayer House, And In Addition To Staffing Full Time To The Internship I Will Also Be Working At Two Other Jobs...So As You Can Tell My Life Is Going To Be Crazy Busy. I Cannot Wait For What God Is Going To Do In The Internship And In The Students And In Me. He Is Going To Do Some Pretty Amazing Things, Not Just With The Internship But In Bethel And For The Rest Of 2010 And Beyond.

Well Prayers Are Appreciated.